tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25274922506330828842024-03-05T01:12:50.409-05:00J'adore Miss EmmeMiss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.comBlogger101125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-40716536490770806432011-10-18T18:35:00.001-04:002011-10-19T17:31:49.533-04:00A Thousand Words<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-IBAP4XFnTM5nGkebKSu8ZgE1_DTGrL3UyHeRasfY2V30Ysdr2Q70Wfu34C6M4367laEG2s5YF0JeKxBGnVTpjIBYxMagQKKnMbYe8c0lB2xbVPJveDV2MQx82yXc58UuRcl-uHKhYr4/s1600/Cartoon+01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-IBAP4XFnTM5nGkebKSu8ZgE1_DTGrL3UyHeRasfY2V30Ysdr2Q70Wfu34C6M4367laEG2s5YF0JeKxBGnVTpjIBYxMagQKKnMbYe8c0lB2xbVPJveDV2MQx82yXc58UuRcl-uHKhYr4/s320/Cartoon+01.jpg" width="215" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The proverb states that, "A picture is worth a thousand words," but this two-frame cartoon featuring 30 words says so much more about the state of relationships between young Black men and women. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
This image has been floating around my Facebook news feed in the last 24 hours and to my surprise it's actually almost a year old. It depicts a young Black woman choosing a <i>thug </i>over a <i>nerd </i>and later [almost 2 children later] attempting to get his attention. There are a plethora of stereotypes and messages presented in this cartoon. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
There is depiction of the <i>Jezebel </i>archetype, seemingly making bad decisions resulting in being alone with two children. She wears the same outfit in both scenes, denoting that she hasn't progressed in life. She begins as an object of desire and ends up with a look of disdain. I questioned the excitement over the cartoon. Do young Black men see themselves as the rejected nerd? Is success [in any definition] some sort of sweet revenge? Why would young Black men want to seek revenge against young Black women?</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The <i>nerd </i>is physically smaller and meeker than the man of choice. Note that he fawns over her and harbors resentment in his telling her to, "beat it." In my experience, this ties directly to how young Black men deal with rejection. Since the <i>nerd </i>doesn't posses physical power, he asserts his power through the material [i.e. a suit, money and sports car]. He basks in the confidence of having the power to reject her. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The artist depicts the <i>thug</i> character as a shirtless, tattooed, jewelry laden baby maker. I understand using two images of Black men that are on opposite ends of the spectrum to make a point. I do not understand imaging of a Black man as a negative. This perpetuates the negative stereotypes of both extremes within our own community. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
There is truth in humor, but I still believe this is a generally unrealistic image where there is splitting [a psychological mechanism used where undesirable parts of oneself are disowned] and projection [when people unconsciously identify with a person, event or attitude by projecting the split parts of themselves] occurring. What is realistic is the self-fulfilling prophecy that occurs with imagery like this. If we believe it will happen then it will.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I'm still left with many a question in this cartoon. What happened during the "years later"? What does the next frame look like? Do Black women have bad taste in men? Is a woman with good taste in men an opportunist? What is the state of Black relationships? My list of questions can go on forever. What do you think?</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Overall, I'm not a fan of the cartoon by any means. Not all Black women are thug-chasing "baby mothers" and shameless opportunists. And not all Black men are the irresponsible thug or docile, emasculated nerd. Stereotypes are wack. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>bisou, bisou</i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><i>Miss Emme</i></b></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-15116035171411308592011-05-20T08:03:00.000-04:002011-05-20T08:03:47.851-04:00In English, Please.<div style="text-align: justify;">Merriam-Webster defines <i>dating </i>as going out on usually romantic dates. Makes sense. A simple term with a simple definition in a world where relationship jargon has become extremely messy. Jargon isn't the only thing that has become complex, but defining boundaries and types of relationships has also become highly involved. When did this all happen?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjg8Aq3_MzOJfveCLParKz3dcILdrX8tRPfdeJEH75gcEFyA-lE1zFgpKOp0rS8pYPuyMmoaCcSLlD0PEG6mDPOuy2KhIwgNCs8y1SiJaS6MLUw-SmPA2Lus8epIKIMTef2i58EcO6ia2E/s1600/bored-woman.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjg8Aq3_MzOJfveCLParKz3dcILdrX8tRPfdeJEH75gcEFyA-lE1zFgpKOp0rS8pYPuyMmoaCcSLlD0PEG6mDPOuy2KhIwgNCs8y1SiJaS6MLUw-SmPA2Lus8epIKIMTef2i58EcO6ia2E/s320/bored-woman.jpg" width="314" /></a></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Going steady. Talking. Hooking up. What does this all translate to? The dynamics of courtship are ever mutating and honestly I'm confused. I still don't know what hooking up <i>really </i>means. And as many other women do, I hate grey areas. The act of dating already consists of its own set of intricacies, so clear definitions are a necessity to me. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I am amongst this set of 21st century women who are <i>talking</i>. Many times a simple, "How do you know John?" results in a, "We talk." <i>We talk</i> can mean anything from literally just being on speaking terms to openly dating to a full blown relationship that just doesn't have titles. Why do we accept these made up, overtly vague terms? Requesting definitions doesn't mean marriage, it's just a friendly, "So, what exactly is this?" Is that so terrible? </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I know that too many questions scare off men my age, but if a simple question like that cannot be answered they probably needed to be dismissed anyhow. Figuring out what the relationship is helps to build the crucial boundaries needed to weigh out your options. The secret is that when no one knows what to call <i>it</i>, no one knows how to treat <i>it</i>. And there you are, trapped in a murky relationship that was no direction. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Courting, seeking the attention or affections of someone with dating potential. Dating, occasional dates and spending time with a person. Openly dating, then I'm free to see other people with potential. Exclusively dating, then I'm seeing one person. Wasn't that easy?! I thought so. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">So, what exactly is this?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I refuse to be wandering in the shadows of shapelessness! However, once you define what you're doing you have to keep true to form. Only boyfriends get "boyfriend privileges" and only husbands receive "husband privileges" in my book. Date smarter, not desperate. Someone will respect your definitions and boundaries. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-47163807458874450142011-05-19T13:52:00.000-04:002011-05-19T13:52:47.573-04:00Abandonment Issues<div style="text-align: justify;">I've abandoned you...</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">And for that I sincerely apologize. Life gets hectic from time to time and the things you love [this here blog] tend to suffer. However, after a three month hiatus, I think you all deserve some conversion about love, dating and everything in between. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I was recently in a production of "For Colored Girls..." [BTW I love my cast mates] and Lady in Yellow, my dear, sweet Amber, demanded my return. Voila, c'est moi!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Stay tuned for new "What Do You Want?!" posts and so much more!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://driven2batshitcrazy.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/the-doctor-is-in.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://driven2batshitcrazy.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/the-doctor-is-in.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou<br />
<b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-3377335847581504532011-02-14T17:37:00.001-05:002011-02-14T17:39:03.896-05:00Valentine's Day: A Blind Date Experiment<div style="text-align: justify;">Throw our names in a hat, pick a name and set them up on a blind date in the name of St. Valentine! Why I agreed to this, I'll never know.<br />
<br />
Four friends and I have agreed to be set up as part of my friend <a href="http://jadoremissemme.blogspot.com/2010/12/what-do-you-want-ones-in-charge.html">Nkem</a>'s "Valentine's Day Experiment," just for fun. Nkem came to us with this Aphrodite-esque proposal and most were reluctant at first, but we succumbed to her plans. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: center;">Meet the Players!</div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2U9RPI7uuG_OGZRHiMAnjjAceC1l_w34qFGBwpoy8Wlh9qAqj1jTXQ1QTYKCyZGV2rBygmqeulJYvazVWhlEaRzi0G308Z4Wsa7ux97rwpJ_dAVKzHMr2EGXJJ9RtQW4uBFSZyoYA4hg/s1600/Alexis+Spencer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2U9RPI7uuG_OGZRHiMAnjjAceC1l_w34qFGBwpoy8Wlh9qAqj1jTXQ1QTYKCyZGV2rBygmqeulJYvazVWhlEaRzi0G308Z4Wsa7ux97rwpJ_dAVKzHMr2EGXJJ9RtQW4uBFSZyoYA4hg/s320/Alexis+Spencer.jpg" width="269" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Alexis - <i>The Reluctant One</i><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2U9RPI7uuG_OGZRHiMAnjjAceC1l_w34qFGBwpoy8Wlh9qAqj1jTXQ1QTYKCyZGV2rBygmqeulJYvazVWhlEaRzi0G308Z4Wsa7ux97rwpJ_dAVKzHMr2EGXJJ9RtQW4uBFSZyoYA4hg/s1600/Alexis+Spencer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyrcLNt0zeXzu73qfP44LAZ4Nmno_zJOqPy7mdrmlgxodKSUEJ9Oqb6INxvb-KUZJNkiK6-nv3mzOnBixuUBqBH9HpsX271GvzihwhHEy7VQqsqCADe9Sbk26wpnUg0NE-DnyVqf6s8lE/s1600/Claudette+Rhone.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyrcLNt0zeXzu73qfP44LAZ4Nmno_zJOqPy7mdrmlgxodKSUEJ9Oqb6INxvb-KUZJNkiK6-nv3mzOnBixuUBqBH9HpsX271GvzihwhHEy7VQqsqCADe9Sbk26wpnUg0NE-DnyVqf6s8lE/s320/Claudette+Rhone.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Claudette - <i>The Positive One</i></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj_a27BE0XoXKuk8vcqyuKQpaVKxTY6u7d0EoQHnoauiwVOAioz4f_vfFYjLOlPhcpEZ25ZmWyHWOcWr05xJd35CrFgEsJhoa1cyXL6NBAuJ4qWD-2u30ERlhRPKnn3yj4uvP6vJhGg2k/s1600/Karenda+Taylor.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjj_a27BE0XoXKuk8vcqyuKQpaVKxTY6u7d0EoQHnoauiwVOAioz4f_vfFYjLOlPhcpEZ25ZmWyHWOcWr05xJd35CrFgEsJhoa1cyXL6NBAuJ4qWD-2u30ERlhRPKnn3yj4uvP6vJhGg2k/s320/Karenda+Taylor.jpg" width="164" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Karenda - <i>The One on the Fence</i></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCHJ-TZTBoMaIs31_KxU_7BK0JlVw3n4Wz8WYCi5npSfigDd3LMmkz-LqMvwZ3dscQ_3dQddTmylXZRMoboB4oI5Uqpfc0I22rKmGaelVLF9VVlXM0I4YLr-w7-qPI231Xegzt-vREKAU/s1600/Nkemdilim+Uzoka.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCHJ-TZTBoMaIs31_KxU_7BK0JlVw3n4Wz8WYCi5npSfigDd3LMmkz-LqMvwZ3dscQ_3dQddTmylXZRMoboB4oI5Uqpfc0I22rKmGaelVLF9VVlXM0I4YLr-w7-qPI231Xegzt-vREKAU/s320/Nkemdilim+Uzoka.jpg" width="154" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Nkem - <i>The Mastermind</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6qk8c_AG5Ymc5Crw6nTTGTPF6y8dXZAWmCUaTymKTIu5K_1dqQjEI7VhxVr3aivrZDXcX1Doz7F3x9dXqK99FR6AwDdFK0ntoNZa6G14BqOTlKiLghbmDjv1lVwim2ResGsS0EX9YC4c/s1600/IMG00008-20110105-2022.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6qk8c_AG5Ymc5Crw6nTTGTPF6y8dXZAWmCUaTymKTIu5K_1dqQjEI7VhxVr3aivrZDXcX1Doz7F3x9dXqK99FR6AwDdFK0ntoNZa6G14BqOTlKiLghbmDjv1lVwim2ResGsS0EX9YC4c/s320/IMG00008-20110105-2022.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Miss Emme - <i>The Observant One</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">Alexis was the hardest to convince and Claudette's participation was dependent on Alexis'. Once they were in, the game was on! My hope for this experiment is for everyone to open up a bit and more importantly have fun. We're all young, educated, driven Black women, why shouldn't we live a little?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">The group has created stipulations that I'll think we'll keep to ourselves and we're quite open-minded, so long as the men are eligible bachelors. We picked the names out of the hat and followed up with "consultations." We know the blind dates are just for fun, but we still want them to be good! I'm to procure a date for Claudette, Claudette's to find a date for Nkem while Nkem's working on a young man for Karenda and finally Karenda's going to set me up. We've been brainstorming together to find the perfect date for Alexis!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">The dates have been chosen and set up for different days this week. So, stay tuned for a follow-up on the V-Day Experiment. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-73240570209092910802011-02-14T17:21:00.001-05:002011-02-14T17:21:46.726-05:00Happy V-Day from Miss Emme ; ]<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/39/98171915_b07b308a32.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/39/98171915_b07b308a32.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Some people dread it, others embrace it and the rest just don't care. Today is Valentine's Day and I'd just like to wish all the lovers of the world an Happy Valentine's Day! It's seasonably warm and the sun is shining. Walk down the street and wish someone a Happy V-Day. You might be surprised at how pleasant the response will be. Spread the LOVE!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Here's my favorite love quote for the road!</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straight-forwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way." -Pablo Neruda</span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://harlemworldblog.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/blacklove.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://harlemworldblog.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/blacklove.jpg" width="252" /></a></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-22017359410902154182011-01-30T19:20:00.001-05:002011-02-01T20:21:03.040-05:00What Do You Want?!: The Non-Standard One & The Lady<div style="text-align: justify;">This time I ventured into the realm of Terrell Brown, you're in for a surprise. I also interviewed my lovely N-Sista, Ugochi. She definitely likes a man's man. Get to know them!</div><div><br />
</div><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhURb4fDzd5dsFT7jThMnk4rG4WZU5D3vUUs6-oRgACKU18yLq4QTkXSZ8RqZ0O5BS2U86hFmv_ExR9Q_WA95RQrxnXKZo5WyKSomhFkSKfaHsKHmIvJoRs5KuMvnM768Ni99wSL2MdLo8/s1600/Terrell+Brown.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhURb4fDzd5dsFT7jThMnk4rG4WZU5D3vUUs6-oRgACKU18yLq4QTkXSZ8RqZ0O5BS2U86hFmv_ExR9Q_WA95RQrxnXKZo5WyKSomhFkSKfaHsKHmIvJoRs5KuMvnM768Ni99wSL2MdLo8/s320/Terrell+Brown.jpg" width="320" /></a><br />
<div style="font-weight: normal; text-align: center;"><b>Name: </b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;">Terrell Brown</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b> </b></span></div></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Age: </b>20</div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Occupation: </b>Student</div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Hometown: </b>Baltimore, Maryland</div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Relationship Status: </b>Very, very perfectly lonely</div><div><b><br />
</b></div><div><b>What physical attributes attract you to a woman?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Umm, well all attributes of a woman attract me. I find a beautiful piece in every woman. I have no preferences. I fall in love with every woman for about five minutes. Beggars can't be choosers. But really preferences, I fall in love with women because of their personalities. And umm, you know. I don't know, I find something beautiful in every woman. Honestly,that's the truth. That's the honest answer. </i></div><div><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Just, umm, that's a good question. I think the best intangible characteristic a woman can have is to be open-minded. I think that covers everything.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What's your favorite thing about Black women?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Besides their beautiful characteristics? I think many women and men would be honest and say their booties. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>So, that's your favorite thing about Black women?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>I mean the shallow side of me. Yes, that is. Absolutely.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>Would you date women of other races? Why or why not?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Why not? I would date any woman of any race. Race doesn't matter to me. If I'm trying to find a woman, I think that's really a f****ed up way to look at things. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>If you could give tell Black women everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Quit the f***ing weave and s**t out and the make-up. Yeah, cut that s**t out. Like, I don't when that fad became huge. I think like in high school it became big because everybody wants to be a model these days. But I think it's pretty f***ing annoying, honestly. I guess sometimes it's cool, but you can't just f***ing substitute your real face and hair for the rest of your life. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Number one would be Oprah because I would hope that she'd break me off. Number two would be Adriana Lima, she's my new found love. Three would be Kim K. of course and number four would be Nicki Minaj's butt.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>Not Nicki Minaj, but Nicki Minaj's butt apart from her?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Yeah, absolutely. And number five I'd have to say would be. I'd go with Kendra Wilkinson's rack. She has some nice boobs.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 16px; font-weight: normal;"></span>Name: </b>Ugochi O. Nzeadighibe</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Age: </b>21</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Occupation: </b>Student</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Hometown: </b>Baltimore, Maryland</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Relationship Status: </b>Single</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-UR9szsj3KjunF1hhE30AqVOB7mQpnaUfDZeYdqf6Q3mW5F-PZr4EfWf92tuapzZTknlMv-SNp8h6zwMVpM_hw-lCOhrcsxXTLK3W8-gQhiAD-s6qeQu9LLU1vGHHyagODtGLpcAHly0/s1600/Ugochi+Nzeadighibe.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="310" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-UR9szsj3KjunF1hhE30AqVOB7mQpnaUfDZeYdqf6Q3mW5F-PZr4EfWf92tuapzZTknlMv-SNp8h6zwMVpM_hw-lCOhrcsxXTLK3W8-gQhiAD-s6qeQu9LLU1vGHHyagODtGLpcAHly0/s320/Ugochi+Nzeadighibe.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What physical attributes attract you to a man?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Height (I'm short, so that's not a problem), teeth (can win me over with a lovely smile) somewhat muscular... loves a man that can wrap his arms around me, make me feel secure! Ohh and a man in uniform/dressed to impress makes me weak. lol</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Intelligent, Honest, Confident, Strong, Motivated, Optimistic and Funny.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What's you favorite thing about Black men?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Their determination and drive for success, strength and courage to overcome daily obstacles.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>Would you date men of other races? </b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>I'm open to dating men form other races, learning things about their life/ the way they were raised but I prefer a black man because it's a common background we share. Plus I love chocolate (both candy & men) there is something about it. I just can't explain in words. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>If you could tell Black men everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Never judge a woman from appearance alone, you will never know what you are missing out on. She might be the woman of your dreams but you let her slip away!</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Hmm...it's hard to choose one! Lance Gross & Common!! (LOVE THEM)</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">If you want to be featured in a "What Do You Want?!" post, email JadoreMissEmme@gmail.com with "interview" as the subject. </span></i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><br />
</span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-88027783111211978162011-01-30T16:27:00.000-05:002011-01-30T16:27:35.484-05:00#TeamWhiteBoys<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjckpSTSEGAu6IO1TFCkQt_DlI1Nc_Gte6zw6AWZ-e0KRWNnwU7kQILDwFY7CgREo9pI-1-M0GWcG6Bgdz1KpZWQ99v110RzpHvf5A7DeKE5_wS2d12Lxjy-WJuT7AOmwh_NB-Y4g8aCTY/s1600/interracial-couple-dating-rules-relationships-black+woman+white+man+love+race+gender+advice.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjckpSTSEGAu6IO1TFCkQt_DlI1Nc_Gte6zw6AWZ-e0KRWNnwU7kQILDwFY7CgREo9pI-1-M0GWcG6Bgdz1KpZWQ99v110RzpHvf5A7DeKE5_wS2d12Lxjy-WJuT7AOmwh_NB-Y4g8aCTY/s1600/interracial-couple-dating-rules-relationships-black+woman+white+man+love+race+gender+advice.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">One day I was tweeting that I wanted in on #TeamWhiteBoys, meaning that I wanted to be well on my way of exploring the realm of dating a white man. To my surprise, I had quite a few retweets. I didn't know that so many other Black women were interested in venturing outside of their race. Just an observation. We created a sort of camaraderie, if you will. <br />
<br />
I brought the subject to my friends [of course]. A few friends were definitely welcoming to the interracial experience, but I did I have one friend who strongly disagreed. She always said she could appreciate a handsome white man, but would never date one. When I asked my Black male friends about dating a white man, they all had a slight shudder at the idea. These were the same men that were all open to the idea of dating a white woman [talk about double standards]. They found the concept to be abandonment and a result of giving up hope on Black men. I'm not giving up hope, but let's call it broadening my horizons.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.slantmagazine.com/images/film/somethingnew.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="175" src="http://www.slantmagazine.com/images/film/somethingnew.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sanaa Lathan & Simon Baker in <i>Something New</i></td></tr>
</tbody></table><i><br />
</i><br />
<i><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0437777/">Something New</a> </i>was the perfect example of a young Black professional woman seeking out love and change in her life and it just happened to with a white man [FINE Simon Baker at that]. To some it's a not such a big deal and to others it seemed to mean the world. I've been asked questions about being able to relate on cultural levels with a white man. I just thought to myself that I also have cultural differences with Black Americans and other Black folk in the Diaspora, so how "different" could it be if we had the fundamental things in common? I remember my father advising me never to be romantically interested in "those American boys," but that was to no avail. I just know that I'll never be familiar "white privilege" and he'll never be able to completely understand the Black experience no matter how much he appreciates it. It comes with the territory.<br />
<br />
Really, what harm can some casual dating do? Could I consider a white man as a serious mate? Honestly, I don't know. Could I share a few drinks and laughs with one? Absolutely. What started as a small joke has grown into a thought-provoking discussion and a new dating adventure. I'll keep you updated.<br />
<br />
Are you #TeamWhiteBoys? Would you consider it? Is it even that serious?<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-75318342483835339962011-01-19T12:54:00.000-05:002011-01-19T12:54:07.202-05:00Gaps of the Generational Kind<div style="text-align: justify;">Wisdom is the kind of thing that is only gained from experience. That was the obvious part, but when times change, what advice remains <i>timeless</i>? Is mom's advice still relevant in a time where women don't wear pantyhose, men stay in the kitchen and people meet their mates on the internet?</div><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">The unwritten rules of dating are constantly changing, but what foundational rules are going to last forever? I have a great respect for the wisdom that my elders have to endow me with, but there are times where that their advice no longer applies. So, I'm often left torn between antiquity and modernity. For instance, I'll wait for a man to open the door for me on a date, but I <i>might</i> pick up the bill. Which old-school rules about the opposite sex do you abide by, today?<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://stuckattheairport.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/SFOJOHNSONCOUPLEDANCING.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://stuckattheairport.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/SFOJOHNSONCOUPLEDANCING.jpg" width="296" /></a></div><br />
Young men don't always meet my parents before they whisk me away on a first date and I believe that a couple should live together before they're married [because you never really know someone until you live with them]. But one piece of advice my mom gave me that always remains relevant was to "let a man be a man." Obviously, that's relative to each individual, but I found that piece of advice from Mommy to be priceless. But those priceless jewels are becoming rare. What's the best piece of generational advice you've ever received?<br />
<br />
Another issue that crosses my mind when speaking on generational shifts, is the change in boundaries and standards that occurs. The generation before us always shakes it head in mild disapproval with a "those crazy kids" tagged to the motion. However, the question that weighs on me is when have the changes gone too far? When different behaviors become more and more acceptable as the years go by, where's the limit? What's distasteful and inappropriate? Moreover, how do we instill those old-school values to put the reigns on modernity gone awry?<br />
<br />
<a href="http://cdn.mymajicdc.com/files//2009/07/black-couple-holding-hands.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://cdn.mymajicdc.com/files//2009/07/black-couple-holding-hands.jpg" width="257" /></a>In a recent conversation with my mom, she admitted that she sometimes wonders if the advice she gives me is pertinent. She doesn't worry too much because luckily I'm attached to some of the more antiquated rules than her progressive self. I'll be telling my daughter to wait for him to open all the doors and teaching my son to always offer to pay first [yeah, I said it!]. What piece of dating advice or rules will you pass down to the next generation?<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-71756533637512851472010-12-16T01:44:00.007-05:002010-12-16T02:51:40.156-05:00What Do You Want?!: The Equal Opposites<b></b><br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>I almost feel like these two are the same type of gears grinding in the opposite direction. Both superbly creative minds, one defined and one abstract, if you will. This is one of my favorites.<br />
<b style="font-weight: bold;"><br />
</b><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghmHXDBmk915UyB7leCjv0r7p6cNflenwWomaDY103rnl0EDXWhzr5lFJ-batN469muT7sqa3QCr6Rf2R_juPu3YDDzfVFN6H9o45DLlRshJhLblUxSnPR4U0NNx4-SnSTkod-TwjxEUM/s1600/Christina+Kenan.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: justify;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghmHXDBmk915UyB7leCjv0r7p6cNflenwWomaDY103rnl0EDXWhzr5lFJ-batN469muT7sqa3QCr6Rf2R_juPu3YDDzfVFN6H9o45DLlRshJhLblUxSnPR4U0NNx4-SnSTkod-TwjxEUM/s320/Christina+Kenan.JPG" width="320" /></a><b style="font-weight: bold;">Name: </b>Christina</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Age: </b>20</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Occupation: </b>Full time student, office worker</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Hometown: </b>Fort Washington, MD</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Relationship Status: </b>Single </div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><b><br />
</b></b></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;"><b><b>What physical attributes attract you to a man?</b></b></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>I'm not really big on physical attributes, but I do notice a man's smile. If you have a beautiful smile and use it often that is an automatic attraction. Secondly would have to be the skin and lastly a fresh shape-up and nice facial hair. And oh yeah, height seeing as I'm 5'10"...</i></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b></b></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Honesty, creativity, goal-oriented, intelligent. </i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><br />
</b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b>What's your favorite thing about Black men?</b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b></b></b><i>Their ability to stand out. </i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><br />
</b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b>Would you date men of other races? Why or why not?</b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b></b></b><i>I would date men of other races because as long as we make a mental connection frivolous things like race will not come in the way. </i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><br />
</b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b>If you could tell Black men everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b></b></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>To open up your hearts and not be afraid to love. </i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><br />
</b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b>If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be? </b></b></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Hmm that's hard...NOT! Of course, Kanye West. </i></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: 900;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;">Christian's interview was the first ever "What Do You Want?!" profile that was recorded. There might be more of this in the future!</div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCtSoLw71TiTlz_EXM-2TEh6sdGAyfQmpNRb4Ok5jCOQUXjMWHmMjydVmE8xbJ6txqty0MNJQpxUAbOyfU-h__GQlB1MXQ8uiWuPYZMcoxPDLMMHktK4n3xN7O245H_KvJ0yDBk7PAxIc/s1600/Christian01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCtSoLw71TiTlz_EXM-2TEh6sdGAyfQmpNRb4Ok5jCOQUXjMWHmMjydVmE8xbJ6txqty0MNJQpxUAbOyfU-h__GQlB1MXQ8uiWuPYZMcoxPDLMMHktK4n3xN7O245H_KvJ0yDBk7PAxIc/s320/Christian01.jpg" width="272" /></a></div><b style="font-weight: bold;">Name: </b>Christian Newson</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Age: </b>22</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Occupation: </b>Student</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Hometown: </b>Silver Spring, MD</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b style="font-weight: bold;">Relationship Status: </b>Single</div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><b><b><b><br />
</b></b></b></b></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b>What physical attributes attract you to a woman?</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Her butt. I just like thick, voluptuous women. I mean the face is all right, but it all starts at the core. </i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b><br />
</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;"><b><b><b><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b></b></b></b></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Independence. Devotion to themselves, not to me. That's key.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><i>[</i>I asked Christian to elaborate on what he meant by devotion and here's the low down..<i>]</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><i><br />
</i></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>You've got to be about you, you can't be worrying about me all the time. If you're worrying about me all the time the relationship's going to be all about me. I'm not going to stress you about what you do because I'll be doing me. I don't want you stressing me about what I do because I'll still be doing me. At the end of the day, that devotion you have to yourself over the devotion you have to me. </i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b><br />
</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b>What's your favorite thing about Black women?</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>The way... I don't want to say that this a bad thing because it can also be their downfall. The way they just are. Black women are not... It's like they need you, but they don't need you. They'll leave you real quick, then they'll come back even quicker. I don't know how to explain it. It's them not needing me. Out of everybody, Black women I'd probably say are the most unsubmissive. If that explains it at all. </i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b><br />
</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b>Would you date women of other races? Why or why not?</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Yes! Because they are submissive and I can have my way with them. Not my way, but there would be very, very little argument. I'm not the type to argue, like other races don't argue. But I don't really mess with other races because I really do just like Black girls. You've got to be mixed with Black, have some of that in you. </i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b><br />
</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b>If you could tell Black women everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>To listen and communicate. Black women don't listen or communicate. They get very emotional real quick. That's all I've got for you, to listen and communicate.</i></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b><br />
</b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><b><b><b>If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be? </b></b></b></b></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>It would be you, Kassandre. Because honestly, you're a great friend and I just appreciate everything you do for me right now. Like even right now, where I'm at right now, you're helping me out. So, it would be you. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">If you would like to submit a "What Do You Want?!" profile, please email JadoreMissEmme@gmail.com with "profile" as the subject. </span></i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-8525994850799533272010-12-10T12:09:00.001-05:002010-12-10T18:00:36.617-05:00Earth Girls Aren't Easy: The Winter Boos<div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://clutchmagonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/Picture-903.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://clutchmagonline.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/Picture-903.png" width="210" /></a></div>It's cold outside, the sun sets at 5 p.m. and something biological is telling you that being alone in your bed at night just isn't right. It's "cuffing season," the time of year when people couple up and everyone on your Twitter timeline feels like cuddling.<br />
<br />
Personally, I'm still getting used to being single and the things that come with that. Being completely unattached is a new realm and this season has me missing the companionship. It was nice to have one person to send that energy towards, but not having that isn't stressing me out by any means.<br />
<br />
I'm curious as to how other single girls are faring. Are other young women experiencing the "winter blues" and hunting for natural body heat? Is the feeling truly biological, mental or just a social standard? Whatever the reason, the <i>cuffing </i>has been happening all around me.<br />
<br />
I must say the amount of phone calls, texts and bbms have definitely increased since the cooler weather has set in. People really just want some company or someone to occupy their time with, but where's the line between finding comfort in someone and making someone your reliable play-thing?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.verysmartbrothas.com/images/black-couple5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.verysmartbrothas.com/images/black-couple5.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>I hate the idea of leading anyone on simply because I enjoy the conversation. I like to talk, I like to laugh and like any human being, I enjoy the attention. I'm capable of participating in that sort of relationship without building more attraction or expecting the relationship to reach another level. Sometimes, I feel as if I need to pump the brakes a bit in order to send the message that things won't be going any further. I just realized while writing this that that can be detrimental to finding a potential partner that may actually be good for me [Self discovery at its finest. Who knew?]. However, I won't used the winter weather as an excuse to rush into something else.<br />
<br />
Back to the point! Is <i>cuffing season </i>something that's dangled over our heads? Is it even worth it to be <i>cuffed up </i>in anticipation of the summer break-up? Are you <i>cuffing </i>this season?<br />
<br />
I've come to the conclusion that the urge to be paired is some natural animal instinct in us to help us survive winter and procreate come spring. Isn't that how rabbits work it out? It's so simple, but then again nothing about human beings is.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-15581093044341298422010-12-04T18:46:00.000-05:002010-12-04T18:46:57.442-05:00What Do You Want?!: The Ones in Charge<div style="text-align: justify;">There's a reason why these two are the ones in charge! Meet Manny, my good friend who runs <a href="http://www.freshhonesty.com/">Fresh Honesty</a> and Nkem, the president of the MSU section of the NPHC. </div><div><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><b>Name: </b>Emanuel Bennett<b> </b><br />
<div><b>Age: </b>23</div><div><b>Occupation: </b>Photographer</div><div><b>Hometown: </b>Brooklyn, NY</div><div><b>Relationship Status: </b>Boo'd Up<br />
<br />
</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQWXzkdSZDKzBT6HWhtluigV9FHilId_mQCZnLNNLauTkFb7bkjerlGbD2vovQz5_FHG4OvkuPVaHL11nWUMDQK6OdPtRJJRBDKhNkTxMYfr2Azt7f96S0cTDCY4KeRF9JaYY-EBoBvQM/s1600/manny+02.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="279" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQWXzkdSZDKzBT6HWhtluigV9FHilId_mQCZnLNNLauTkFb7bkjerlGbD2vovQz5_FHG4OvkuPVaHL11nWUMDQK6OdPtRJJRBDKhNkTxMYfr2Azt7f96S0cTDCY4KeRF9JaYY-EBoBvQM/s320/manny+02.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b><br />
</b></div><div><b>What physical attributes attract you to a woman? </b> </div><div><i>Eyes, Smile, Teeth, Lips, Breast, Legs, Voice</i></div><div><b><br />
</b></div><div><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b></div><div><i>Understanding and Trust. </i></div><div><b><br />
</b></div><div><b>What's your favorite thing about Black women?</b></div><div><i>Strength.</i></div><div><b><br />
</b></div><div><b>Would you date women of other races? Why or why not?</b></div><div><i>Sure, people are people even if they descend from other tribes.</i></div><div><b><br />
</b></div><div><b>If you could tell Black women everywhere the perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b></div><div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Love yourself and embrace your beauty. You are the most exotic, most powerful and most important force on this earth so start acting like it.</i></div></div><div><b><br />
</b></div><div><b>If you could pick anyone in the world on a romantic date, who would it be?</b></div><div><i>It's a secret...</i></div><div><i><br />
</i><br />
<b>Name:</b> Nkemdilim [kem-dill-em] Uzoka<br />
<b>Age: </b>22<br />
<b>Occupation: </b>Student<br />
<b>Hometown: </b>Largo, Maryland<br />
<b>Relationship Status: </b>Single<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8tQ8XelUBifzwz54Z1NHfefMiHpY4ei7XIvPfaUdq_w5N0rAbh6d_DOwPrU4fvwa3AKzIbKqESBZzeZsU64VQPChPPXqXPXf2qVFoCse40nQg4XLRBJAuF-oJsaChgfot-oJyXNmHEmo/s1600/nkem+01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8tQ8XelUBifzwz54Z1NHfefMiHpY4ei7XIvPfaUdq_w5N0rAbh6d_DOwPrU4fvwa3AKzIbKqESBZzeZsU64VQPChPPXqXPXf2qVFoCse40nQg4XLRBJAuF-oJsaChgfot-oJyXNmHEmo/s320/nkem+01.jpg" width="201" /></a><b>What physical attributes attract you to a man?</b><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Like a basketball player/ quarterback physique. Must be taller. I like thicker, well shaped eyebrows. I like someone who resembles a feline. Nice smile, great lips. Nice teeth, too. You've got to have nice hands. Well-fitted clothes, everything has to look clean and no dirty sneakers. Pretty boys. Pretty eyes.</i></div><b><br />
</b><br />
<i></i><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Sensitivity, I like a guy who's not afraid to show his emotions. You've got to be able to laugh at yourself and being gentle is important. And spontaneous! Intelligent, too.</i></div><b><br />
</b><br />
<b>What's your favorite thing about Black men?</b><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"><i>They're drive. When a Black man really wants something, whether it's good or bad they do whatever it takes to get it. And I like the diversity within our culture.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><b>Would you date men of other races? Why or why not?</b><br />
<i>Hell yeah. Why not?</i><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>If you could give Black men everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b><br />
<i>Keep your head up. Psych! Black women really appreciate you. </i><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be?</b><br />
<i>Lil Fizz. </i>[she's serious] <i>And Lance Gross.</i><br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">If you're interested in having a "What Do You Want?!" profile posted, email JadoreMissEmme@gmail.com with interview as the subject.</span></i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"></span></i><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-74981747975331235622010-12-02T19:25:00.002-05:002010-12-02T19:27:45.969-05:00Girls... with Friends<div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.rainydaytraveler.com/Images/HollywoodImages/girlfriends.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="156" src="http://www.rainydaytraveler.com/Images/HollywoodImages/girlfriends.bmp" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Friends. They seem to be an epidemic in young Black relationships. We've heard it in music, seen it on film and have even observed in our own lives. No matter how intensely you feel about your significant other, there always seems to be that one friend that you just cannot stand. It's that simple.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">"I don't like them," is the phrase that's spewed out and often paired with a disapproving expression. The reasons may vary, but the issue exists across the board. Whether it's the friend with the bad attitude, the friend that is single or the most-hated male friend, there is a question about why the relationship exists. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">My friends weren't well-liked in my last relationship and neither was the fact that I had a lot more male friends and acquaintances than he expected. He thought that my stance with him was compromised by my loyalty to my friends and male friends always had some hidden agenda. It was difficult to find a median, having to remain true to my friendships and still creating a comfortable environment for my significant other. I'm sure I'm not the only woman that has had to find the balance between the two.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://postpostracial.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/3265371861_0fe4ba5149.jpg?w=500&h=407" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="260" ox="true" src="http://postpostracial.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/3265371861_0fe4ba5149.jpg?w=500&h=407" width="320" /></a></div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I've heard of all sorts of reasons why men didn't like the company kept by their woman. Single friends are another common issue, having a problem with the advice that they give to where they spend their time and how they dress. They love spending time with you and hate on your relationship just so the two of you can be single together. Then there's the Martin-Pam combination, enough said.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">The idea that a man or woman didn't like their partner's friends has always denoted, for me, a lack of trust in their partner's judgment. And with that logic it only leads me to ask, if she can't pick good friends, how could she possibly pick a good boyfriend?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">It sometimes seems as if a man's loyalty to his friends completely overrides a woman's loyalty to hers. I believe that it ties right into the traditional concept of women having to sacrifice their lifestyles and replacing it with that of their significant other. Are young women still filing themselves into those positions? How are we supposed love and accept every friend that they've made in a lifetime, when they won't think twice about accepting ours? </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><em>bisou, bisou</em></div><div style="text-align: center;"><strong><em>Miss Emme</em></strong></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-66001201850897958072010-11-16T15:02:00.007-05:002010-11-16T15:27:06.431-05:00What Do You Want?!: The Honest Ones<div style="text-align: justify;">The volume of responses to this survey has been absolutely amazing and greatly appreciated! Profiles will still be posted weekly and I promise all of your submissions will be displayed! With that squared away, there are two new people for you all to meet. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b></b><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b>Name: </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;">Nicole Edmonds</span></b></div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Age: </b>21</div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Occupation: </b>Student</div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Hometown: </b>New York, New York</div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Relationship Status: </b>Single<br />
<br />
</div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9rudWCIGF78I2Hisbda6EncZYC-osoScFP79HyxotzDPNdh8xjCR27aPA-5Kel1P0G_05hsomaKZrVd1RYEetjhkdmOmeY9u2GSFgKnWn-Fjwvxe_Vjv4csBes2M_-SwZe6V5VeHpuhM/s1600/Cola.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9rudWCIGF78I2Hisbda6EncZYC-osoScFP79HyxotzDPNdh8xjCR27aPA-5Kel1P0G_05hsomaKZrVd1RYEetjhkdmOmeY9u2GSFgKnWn-Fjwvxe_Vjv4csBes2M_-SwZe6V5VeHpuhM/s320/Cola.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What physical attributes attract you to a man?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>The way they're dressed and how they're groomed. Also, a slightly bow-legged man. You have to be taller than me. That's a must! NO DIRTY SNEAKERS. No thick-ums and you cannot be fat.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>A sense of humor is very important. I feel like a nice personality is so general, but you can't be an a##hole. Then, there's the obvious things like loyal and faithful. Also, I kind of like a guy who takes control. I like guys that are forward, like aggressive.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What's your favorite thing about Black men? </b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Their complexion, oh my goodness! A nice brown tone is just amazing. And you can't be ashy. That's gross. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>Would you date men of other races? Why or why not?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>No. I'm just not attracted to any other races. I can recognize a handsome or attractive man of any race, but it's not going any further than that. You gotta be a certain complexion to ride this ride. [laughs]</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>If you could tell Black men everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Don't be on that bullsh#t. Stop being selfish and be upfront about what you want. And stop being back-and-forth. Nobody has time for that. AND stop lying so much, damn!</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>DERWIN! Pooch Hall. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Name: </b><i>Stephan</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Age: </b><i>23</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Occupation: </b><i>Full Time: Student, Part Time: Customer Service</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Hometown: </b><i>Fort Washington, MD by way of Queens, NY</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>Relationship Status: </b><i>Single</i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrUPNDFqMLvQ6KnMJvvGBXVMYC6jNGGkgJafCkN03pLYX4RO08qzj6dJXcsPybRO1cZce0dNSoVfVrLO_waBd3exB62CqJqrouOMNs3hTssXGpoosF533mGCAkWRmQuavsE00s7u1BXX8/s1600/Stephan+Cox.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrUPNDFqMLvQ6KnMJvvGBXVMYC6jNGGkgJafCkN03pLYX4RO08qzj6dJXcsPybRO1cZce0dNSoVfVrLO_waBd3exB62CqJqrouOMNs3hTssXGpoosF533mGCAkWRmQuavsE00s7u1BXX8/s320/Stephan+Cox.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><b><br />
</b><br />
<b>What physical attributes attract you to a woman?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Long legs, nice butt, nice teeth and eyes.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Confidence, there's somethings to be said for someone who can walk into a room and say nothing at all and still be seen off of charisma alone. Someone that has a colorful personality, I like someone that has many different interests and someone I can talk to without feeling like we're talking about nothing even though we probably are.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>What's your favorite thing about Black women?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>I see strength in black women. That's not to say that I don't see strength in other races but that's just a characteristic that always jumps out at me when I think of my sisters.</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>Would you date women of other races? Why or why not?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Yes, I am child of many different races and cultures and as such I am attracted to many different things. However, when I look at one race over another I'm not looking at the same things. I'm looking at the differences, in a good way. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>If you could tell Black women Everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Because you have had the weight of the world on your shoulders doesn't mean that the strength you've earned needs to become the anger you feel. Those who notice your struggle appreciate it. </i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><b>If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be?</b></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i>Stacey Dash, enough said!</i></div><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">If you want to be featured in a "What Do You Want?!" post, email JadoreMissEmme@gmail.com with "interview" as the subject. </span></i></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-54605989913668981192010-11-13T16:21:00.001-05:002010-11-13T16:23:42.198-05:00A Dream Deferred<div style="text-align: justify;">I was listening to <a href="http://www.ralphfolarin.com/blog">Wale's</a> "Ambitious Girl" track off of his <em>More About Nothing </em>mixtape [which I do often] and was fascinated by his admiration of a young woman who chases her dreams. He described it as a turn-on saying things like, "...your drive drives me crazy" and "...your productivity is the reason I interest." It's definitely a fitting song for the young women at my university, especially the ones I surround myself with; young Black women who are dream chasers.<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">This same song also left me reflecting on the famous quote from <em>I Think I Love My Wife</em>, "You can lose lots of money chasing women, but you will NEVER lose women chasing money." This adage doesn't particularly hold true for women. There has always been a plethora of stories, especially about Black women, losing out on love because they chose a more ambitious route. Why don't men chase the dream chasers?</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">Black women have so much more to lose in the pursuit of our dreams, sacrificing relationships, pushing emotions to the side and losing out personal time, having to strive a little bit harder than everyone else. There are those that push through and see their endeavors come to fruition. Others put themselves to the side and watch their dreams slip away. The truth is we can have it all, just not all at the same time.</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><a href="http://www.essence.com/images/mt/woman-business-suit-425.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.essence.com/images/mt/woman-business-suit-425.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="225" /></a>It depends on what's important and when it becomes important. Priorities change with time, but I'm definitely using my youth to better myself, strive for my goals and grow as a person. How can I expect so much from a partner if I'm not bringing anything to the table? Let's call it evenly yoked, on all levels. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">I've spoken with more experienced career women that have all met with the same challenge. Compromise. Some working harder in their fields in order to support their families and some slowing down on their career paths because they desired families. They all managed to find a balance, whether it meant sacrificing one thing or another. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">But where does that leave the 20 year old college junior with entrepreneurial aspirations? And the 23 year old fresh out of a university looking for a graduate school in a new state? We are least likely to have serious obligations forcing us to make those sacrifices. Yet, we face some of our counterparts who believe the choice is simple. It's one thing to consider the future plans of a significant other and another to allow your own plans to fall by the wayside. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">How much would you compromise in the name of love? Is seeking independence a man deterrent? Where are the men chasing the dream chasers [Is Wale the only one? LOL]? Is the premise of <i>Deliver Us From Eva </i>a prevalent reality? </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 6px; padding-left: 6px; padding-right: 6px; padding-top: 6px; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://veryspecialepisode.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/claire-and-cliff-huxtable-1240038270.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://veryspecialepisode.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/claire-and-cliff-huxtable-1240038270.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="font-size: 13px; padding-top: 4px; text-align: center;">Too unrealistic?</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-8455341960879151632010-11-11T20:43:00.006-05:002010-11-12T23:30:20.059-05:00He Doesn't Know It<div style="text-align: justify;">If you can't tell, I enjoy the genius of <i>Nina Simone</i>. One of my all time favorite songs is "He Needs Me." So, as an interlude to the regular posts I'm tossing this video into the mix. Hope you enjoy it.</div><br />
<br />
<center><iframe class="youtube-player" frameborder="0" height="349" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Z37cABLYJbs" title="YouTube video player" type="text/html" width="425"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><i>He needs me</i></center><center><i>He doesn't know it, but he needs me</i></center><center><i>And so no matter where he goes </i></center><center><i>Though he doesn't care </i></center><center><i>He knows that I'm there </i></center><center><i><br />
</i></center><center><i>He needs me</i></center><center><i>I ought to leave him, but he needs me</i></center><center><i>I know that I ain't very bright </i></center><center><i>Just to tag alone</i></center><center><i>Oh, but right or wrong</i></center><center><i>I'm his and I'm here</i></center><center><i>And I'm gonna be his friend or his lover</i></center><center><i><br />
</i></center><center><i>'Cause my one ambition is</i></center><center><i>To wake him and make him discover</i></center><center><i>That he needs me</i></center><center><i>I've got to follow where he leads me</i></center><center><i>Or else he'll never know that I need him </i></center><center><i>Just as he needs me </i></center><center><i><br />
</i></center><center><i>bisou,bisou</i></center><center><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></center>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-65081616816060180252010-11-09T20:32:00.003-05:002010-11-12T23:25:02.318-05:00What Do You Want?! : The Pioneers<div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="margin: 0px;">This is the first post [outside of my own] of the "What Do You Want?!" feature. Every week, I'll be spotlighting a young man and young woman who were brave enough to disclose their preferences. These two can be considered the pioneers because they were the first to respond to my request [thanks a million!]. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Thomas...</div><div style="margin: 0px;"><br />
</div></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div style="margin: 0px;"></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipwE7wNc97PumT-KSAUlYGt2JGrXln2dBdcXKSXPlCd46irCqx10zbHp3uOLtBvKQ4wS1nJ2C5Lb3UhIaApBCR79oM0Od4DsORnbUYnLM6VY_XVhwUQJcmCFnlPK2hfdAOtm8k_kDIrhg/s1600/Fast+and+Flirtatious+029.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipwE7wNc97PumT-KSAUlYGt2JGrXln2dBdcXKSXPlCd46irCqx10zbHp3uOLtBvKQ4wS1nJ2C5Lb3UhIaApBCR79oM0Od4DsORnbUYnLM6VY_XVhwUQJcmCFnlPK2hfdAOtm8k_kDIrhg/s320/Fast+and+Flirtatious+029.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="179" /></a></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>Name: </b>Thomas N. Wynder</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>Age: </b>early 20s </div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>Occupation: </b> Fashion Retail Management</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>Hometown: </b>Detroit, MI [DETROIT WHAT!!!!!]</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>Relationship Status: </b>Single</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>What physical attributes attract you to a woman? </b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><i>Height, I'm 6'4"...</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>What intangible attributes do you find important? </b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><i>Intelligence, confidence, class, culture, drive. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>What's your favorite thing about Black women? </b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><i>Their uniqueness. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: left;"><b>Would you date women of other races? Why or why not? </b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>Depends on what we mean by date... Casually, yes. Seriously, no. As my mother once told me, it is the ultimate disrespect to bring someone home to your mother who has nothing in common with her. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>If you could tell Black women everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be? </b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>Pursue what it is that you desire from life, not a man. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>This one's for fun! If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be? </b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>Halle Berry</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;">...and Tamille!</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>Name: </b>Tamille</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>Age: </b>23</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>Occupation: </b>Library Office Aide</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>Hometown: </b>Brooklyn, NY</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>Relationship Status: </b>Single</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVHSyKmBpD_e2OLKTEzzVK_mQoBk_v4Bx-jk62JkjgfgSS3R_8KKP5GbvEJum7_-HYd8nTqe5ZXdLxVbe_Upl-hP-ZrIVdpK2ibgPZlezI53jdGPx7OX9-mrwTU0lVvok5HKRjvNX5pZE/s1600/bbg+%25283%2529.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVHSyKmBpD_e2OLKTEzzVK_mQoBk_v4Bx-jk62JkjgfgSS3R_8KKP5GbvEJum7_-HYd8nTqe5ZXdLxVbe_Upl-hP-ZrIVdpK2ibgPZlezI53jdGPx7OX9-mrwTU0lVvok5HKRjvNX5pZE/s320/bbg+%25283%2529.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b></b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b>What physical attributes attract you to a man?</b></span></b></div><br />
<div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>I'm pretty flexible when it comes to looks. I think beauty comes in all shades and forms. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>What intangible characteristics do you find important? </b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>Honesty, integrity, intelligence, dependability, loyalty. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>What's your favorite thing about Black men?</b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>Sharing a common culture. I've dated outside my race before and sometimes when you make a joke about childhood or being raised by a black mother they don't get it but you know a black man is going to know exactly what you're talking about. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>Would you date men of other races? Why or why not?</b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>I've done it twice, because like I said beauty comes in all shades and forms. What's more important to me is how he treats me. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>If you could tell Black men everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be? </b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>If you come across a real woman in your life don't mess around and loose her. You'll regret later. </i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><b>This one's for fun! If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be?</b></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i>Drake or Aubrey Graham or Wheelchair Jimmy, whatever you know him as lol</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;">Thank you guys! It was a treat to receive these!!</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">If you want to be featured in a "What Do You Want?!" post, email <a href="mailto:JadoreMissEmme@gmail.com">JadoreMissEmme@gmail.com</a> with "interview" in the subject.</span></i> </div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="margin: 0px; text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-40134028843266273782010-11-09T19:17:00.004-05:002010-11-15T01:58:35.762-05:00Natural Hair + Black Men= ?<div style="text-align: justify;">In celebration of my first "Big Chop" anniversary, I wanted to touch on my experience with natural hair in the dating realm. When I first decided to transition from relaxed to natural hair, I was already in a serious relationship. My boyfriend was supportive of my choice as long as I didn't end up with a low ceasar. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVT5hzNc9MUwVazzmtIYb3bvxkWCcs7KRrpJ1fr3MRuAwRcIZiYGeg_8vPPyx2-zueUUNhK4TRfl03Vl3IF-hDwjWyi7RNniqXGbD2DMGd40iTKbyWjk92XjWvMAgzFQrZSO9ITvDG4r0/s1600/Kae+Before.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="191" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVT5hzNc9MUwVazzmtIYb3bvxkWCcs7KRrpJ1fr3MRuAwRcIZiYGeg_8vPPyx2-zueUUNhK4TRfl03Vl3IF-hDwjWyi7RNniqXGbD2DMGd40iTKbyWjk92XjWvMAgzFQrZSO9ITvDG4r0/s200/Kae+Before.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">December 2009</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="text-align: justify;">I was concerned about growing my hair long enough before cutting off my relaxed ends. He expressed that I should practice the virtue of patience. I had only made it about five months before the scissors began to call my name. I stood in my bathroom for two hours carefully cutting away at my own mane. I panicked. I was afraid of what I had done to myself, afraid that I had made myself ugly and definitely afraid to tell him what I had done.<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I waited 24 hours and sent him a picture. I anxiously awaited the response. "Well, it was nice while it lasted," was the reply I received. I was in shock and in tears. I took him seriously and according to him that was supposed to be a joke. I never found it funny. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I wanted to be natural and I wasn't overly concerned about what other people thought. As soon as I cut it all off, the insecurities came flooding in. Did I look like a boy? Did I make a mistake? Does my boyfriend hate it? Do I hide my hair until I'm comfortable? I struggled. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
I always wondered if other naturals were concerned about how their choice would affect their relationships or dating prospects. Or if their significant others were open-minded enough to accept the change and confident enough to defend the tresses, long, short, relaxed or natural. Sometimes, Black men's insecurities are reflected in the women that they date; with women having to appear a certain way for their own comfort. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfF9-cJqMTDdB3wEnDO5RnKbd8ZiEolY-Oh3Oi5ZrYkey6w3NI4EnFltnu_nZhEG2w-24oDn972HQdcJh75AyX-_mxlz9XaZfCVU_gvuq6T9sFhuOW3WHf3c7maWDUcVV8xAC_vzERX00/s1600/IMG01437-20101108-1031.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfF9-cJqMTDdB3wEnDO5RnKbd8ZiEolY-Oh3Oi5ZrYkey6w3NI4EnFltnu_nZhEG2w-24oDn972HQdcJh75AyX-_mxlz9XaZfCVU_gvuq6T9sFhuOW3WHf3c7maWDUcVV8xAC_vzERX00/s320/IMG01437-20101108-1031.jpg" width="196" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">November 2010</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Another question that has remained in the back of my mind was about the type of men natural hair attracts. I notice that more seemingly Afrocentric and artistic men and loc wearers approach a natural girl. We get called things like "sister" and "queen." Do those men see natural-haired women in a different light? Do other men see natural-haired women as unapproachable?<br />
<br />
If my curls deflect men of my interest, maybe those men should have never been on my mind in the first place. Do you think that natural or relaxed hair makes a difference?<br />
<br />
About two months after my "big chop," my boyfriend saw my hair in person for the first time. It wasn't so bad, after all. He liked it better than he thought he would. My hair being natural actually didn't matter much. I had fussed over nothing. He was interested in me and that meant accepting my curls as part of the package.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i><br />
<i></i><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-70511228680935291882010-11-04T16:59:00.012-04:002010-11-09T20:47:50.535-05:00What Do You Want?! : The Quest<div style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://www.mochadates.com/images/image.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="http://www.mochadates.com/images/image.jpg" width="200" /></a>In the last post, I announced that I was going to begin my quest of finding out what Black men want. No, I am not being biased. I'm also interviewing Black women to found out what they want from their counterparts. Together, we're going to disperse myths, create realistic views and demystify the dating realm. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">These posts will be popping up soon! So, I'll leave you with one of my favorite quotes about love. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">"Love, I find, is like singing. Everybody can do enough to satisfy themselves, though it may not impress the neighbors as being very much." -Zora Neale Hurston </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
<i>Update--</i><br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<i>My friends have convinced me to give a preview of the "What Do You Want" profile by posting my own!</i><br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<b>Name: </b>Miss Emme<br />
<b>Age: </b>22<br />
<b>Occupation: </b>Student<br />
<b>Hometown: </b>Brooklyn, New York<br />
<b>Relationship Status: </b>Single<br />
<br />
<b>What physical attributes attract you to a man?</b><br />
Teeth, I love a great smile. A tall man is definitely preferred; so are warm eyes, smooth skin and basketball player's frame. I also like a strong sense of personal style. A man in a well-tailored suit always gets bonus points.<br />
<br />
<b>What intangible characteristics do you find important?</b><br />
I value honesty and openness; and an intelligent man that can hold a conversation and leave me with something new. Generosity is very important, so is a quirky sense of humor. A gentlemen with confidence and ambition is very sexy.<br />
<br />
<b>What is your favorite thing about Black men?</b><br />
Their strength and their ability to persevere. <br />
<br />
<b>Would you date men of other races? Why or why not?</b><br />
I would. I've always been open to the idea. There's no particular reason why or why not.<br />
<br />
<b>If you could tell Black men everywhere the most perfect piece of advice, what would it be?</b><br />
Give women everything that you want in return.<br />
<br />
<b>This one's for fun! If you could pick anyone in the world to take on a romantic date, who would it be?</b><br />
I have three! Idris Elba, Common and Wale. They're each very different men. It'd be interesting to interact with them all.<br />
<br />
<i>There it is! The first "What Do You Want" profile. Let me know what you think!</i><br />
<i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-8701393878762647912010-11-03T20:52:00.003-04:002010-11-04T16:55:33.646-04:00The Laws of Attraction<div style="text-align: justify;">"Do you really think that guys notice that?" My friend chuckled at that fact that women wear mascara and false lashes to make their eyes stand out and essentially seem more attractive. "Who told you that? A girl told you that?"</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://www.corbisimages.com/images/572/D5DA8EA8-82F1-4DC6-B7C0-25676EBD5FFB/42-19748608.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.corbisimages.com/images/572/D5DA8EA8-82F1-4DC6-B7C0-25676EBD5FFB/42-19748608.jpg" width="213" /></a>The discussion continued. He claimed men don't notice every tiny detail that women painstakingly pour over to make themselves appear a certain way. I argued that the details are what make up the big picture and overall appearance is rarely ignored by male or female. His simple, "Who told you that?," continued to ring in my head long after the conversation was over.<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Who set the standards? Why do we really wear mascara? Who do we wear the mascara for? Now, don't get me wrong. I like to play in make-up as much as the next M.A.C. girl, but I never really questioned why I was wearing make-up. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
Everything from how women wear make-up and how we do our hair, to the tight jeans that show off the cheeks and the bra that pushes breasts into the heavens is a part of beautifying and enhancing ourselves. But for who? If the men don't notice the details, who do we dress up for? I know there is a slew of you saying that we do it for ourselves, to make ourselves feel good and to express ourselves outwardly. That's perfectly fine. However, our outward appearance does greatly affect how we feel. For instance a bad hair day can ruin any woman's mood whether or not anyone else seems to notice.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://mikastefano.files.wordpress.com/2009/10/african_american_makeup_looks_and_trends.jpg?w=199&h=230" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://mikastefano.files.wordpress.com/2009/10/african_american_makeup_looks_and_trends.jpg?w=199&h=230" /></a></div>Appearance is an important part of attraction. It's the first few seconds that determine whether or not conversation will be held to find out what goes along with the facade. Women, especially those seeking out a partner, invest in that attraction. Lest we not forget that beauty is a multi-million dollar industry with Black women making sure that their "hair's done, nails done, everything did."<br />
<br />
We continue to suck it, tuck it, sew it, push it, brush it, hide it and reveal it in order to pull the right man. If we have to do all of that, are we really attracting the right mate? What is a young Black man attracted to, anyway? And what attributes are going to help you get past the second date?<br />
<br />
Thus, begins my quest! I am going to find out what it is that Black men want and share it with you all. What do you think?<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-51402044846955795902010-10-31T16:39:00.001-04:002010-10-31T17:10:38.979-04:00Earth Girls Aren't Easy: The Weight for Love<div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPtBEX22wYeLIZfXwMpqh3VMG0isxXaer8lDOAtR2iKGJVWfZ_5V5bh9CsORNQhLbBg1C6yF6kGALGpPjbAmHwza_8Hysc1NGv93cqqh6RrBKmF6v6zKEt2g01vnApmfa7JgFOqKR0koNq/s1600/story_xlimage_2010_07_R261_harlem_statue_07012010.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPtBEX22wYeLIZfXwMpqh3VMG0isxXaer8lDOAtR2iKGJVWfZ_5V5bh9CsORNQhLbBg1C6yF6kGALGpPjbAmHwza_8Hysc1NGv93cqqh6RrBKmF6v6zKEt2g01vnApmfa7JgFOqKR0koNq/s320/story_xlimage_2010_07_R261_harlem_statue_07012010.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Big. Thick. Fluffy. Plus-sized. These are just some of the names we are called or call ourselves; women larger than average size, according to standards set forth by different industries.<br />
<br />
</div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://static.thehollywoodgossip.com/images/gallery/joanne-borgella-pic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://static.thehollywoodgossip.com/images/gallery/joanne-borgella-pic.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>There seems to be a different set of rules when it comes to dating for the plus set or so it's thought. It's as if we can't have another single flaw, so that we can manage to offset our stature. One must be dressed to impressed, hair always styled, have the best personality in the room and be smarter and funnier than every pretty girl within a mile radius. Our selection of men is even smaller, having hopes that the fine man across the room is interested in bigger women. And we have to avoid the ever-roaming weirdo that is interested only in the novelty of our size. </div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">We don't have to confine ourselves to any one category of men. And we most certainly don't have to be grateful for every ounce of male attention we get. Though the media has a certain disdain for fuller figures and anyone considered overweight [check out Maura Kelly's <i>Marie Claire </i><a href="http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/dating-blog/overweight-couples-on-television?click=main_sr">article</a>], the Black community has an appreciation for the more Rubenesque woman.<br />
<br />
[<i>It's evolved into an obsession with Black women everywhere disproportionately altering their bodies in glorification of tiny waists, wider hips, rounder backsides and large breasts that many of us were already born with, but I digress. That's another issue for another post on another blog.</i>]<br />
<br />
More Black men than we think are attracted to the abundance of curves and are interested in getting to know what is beyond the physical appearance. I still believe that a lot of men don't want to be classified as "chubby chasers" for dating a plus-sized woman, but that's neither here nor there.<br />
<br />
The dating scene can provide the same amount of difficulty for any woman. Do you think plus-sized women have it harder in the dating world? Does the media dictate what we find attractive? Do bigger men get more love than bigger women? Just curious!<br />
<br />
I say we big girls stay classy, stay beautiful and most of all stay ourselves. The glow is bound to attract the right one.<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-16003642694295766002010-10-27T15:38:00.001-04:002010-10-27T22:40:40.103-04:00Majoring in Marriage<div style="text-align: justify;">Homecoming week has just ended at my university. The Bears led us to another victory and campus was swarming with students, alumni and visitors. Towards the end of the festivities of Saturday evening, I sat outside of our Jenkins Building for some fresh air. An older man sat next to me and asked me if I was okay. I told him that I was fine. He asked what my classification was, about my major and a range of other small-talk questions. Finally, he had asked me if I had found my husband, yet. Jokingly, I told him that I was divorced and asked him if he had found his wife. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">He had. He found her in 1991 during their freshmen year. They entered Greek life at the same time and graduated together. They hadn't been apart since. It was so Bill and Camille. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://imagecache6.allposters.com/LRG/30/3075/PZVDF00Z.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://imagecache6.allposters.com/LRG/30/3075/PZVDF00Z.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">This was the fantasy. The fantasy that so many young women leave for college with. Either by boyfriend with promise ring in tow or a husband-seeking missile, the fairytale ending to a college career seems to include an engagement ring.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgg6397td0KKcuTizagkwV4_gJ1uOEyj1tWFCAVYX5Ew62x7U6cjmsKB5jBeqWN0YzMBgJmGXNp8C-qrnR-QftHT55wYLfLfHhcP4RpnzTT0wSZs5OOO_r9LMZfLoj9oIiUjp2EsXga8_k/s1600/engagement+ring+01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgg6397td0KKcuTizagkwV4_gJ1uOEyj1tWFCAVYX5Ew62x7U6cjmsKB5jBeqWN0YzMBgJmGXNp8C-qrnR-QftHT55wYLfLfHhcP4RpnzTT0wSZs5OOO_r9LMZfLoj9oIiUjp2EsXga8_k/s320/engagement+ring+01.jpg" width="233" /></a></div><div style="text-align: justify;">Is it fair to us to indulge in such a legend? Women already outnumber men on most college campuses. And honestly, it's hard enough managing academics, a social life and other extracurricular activities without the joys and pains of a serious relationship. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">But we want it all, the perfect schedule, the perfect internship, the perfect friends and the perfect man. There are those girls [aliens sent from another planet] that seemingly juggle it all. And those one-in-a-million, college sweetheart relationships do exist and end up in beautiful marriages. Then there are those that venture out into the world of independence after college and find the same happy relationships at 30 and 35. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I believe that there is absolutely no need to rush yourself into a relationship. My 22 year-old self looks back at my 18 year-old self entering college and shakes her head at inexperience and naivete. Yet, I'm still not prepared for the marriage route, ever teetering between the thought of white picket fences and suburban living and the fast, city, single life. Hopefully, I'll find the medium between the two; fast, city, married life would be ideal.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-12103421920004806372010-10-22T23:15:00.003-04:002010-10-24T18:13:02.913-04:00Preferences & Pedestals<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><a href="http://poplicks.com/images/jungle-fever-poster.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="191" src="http://poplicks.com/images/jungle-fever-poster.jpg" width="200" /></a>I mentioned that an article in the November issue of Essence is what sparked my interest in addressing Black women and relationships. <a href="http://www.abelleinbrooklyn.com/about-belle/">Demetria L. Lucas</a>, often referred to as the "<i>Black Carrie Bradshaw</i>," penned a piece entitled "<i>Us vs. Them</i>", questioning the reasons behind the dating preferences of Black men. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Generally, the article pointed out that Black men tend to put women of other races on a pedestal and that there preferences were based on what they didn't like about Black women. I had to agree with Ms. Lucas. I have definitely come across the complaints of Black men wishing that Black women were more supportive like white women, more coddling like Latina women or subservient like Asian women. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: justify;">There is nothing wrong with an independent, opinionated, self-sufficient woman, period. There is something wrong with the fact that Black women get so much flack for having those attributes. We are not all finger-waving, neck-rolling, attitude-having harpies.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I brought the conversation to my friends, five other women and one man. There was one particular point that struck a chord for me. My friend brought up that men and women of other races are rarely ever caught up in downing their cultural counterparts in justification of their preferences. I have yet to come across the opposite, but often run into Black men looking for the "best race" to date and Black women considering dating outside of their race because Black men "ain't sh*t." </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">And of course there is the standard of beauty issue. Are our men suffering from "Kardashian Syndrome," in love with long hair, lighter or fair skin and exotic features and not wanting to deal with scarf-wrapped head at night? Why are the cultural behaviors of other women so preferred? That leads me to wonder if Black men appreciate the cultural behaviors of their mothers, sisters and aunts? Better yet, what are they instilling into their daughters? </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I am partial to Black men, but have never completely dismissed men of other races. And I've never belittled a Black man to legitimize what I generally like about men. What's your preference? </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">Finally, do Black men really insult us to exalt other races of women?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-8685612330605656442010-10-22T00:33:00.014-04:002010-11-04T21:55:46.748-04:00Earth Girls Aren't Easy: The Shift<div style="text-align: justify;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://nett.com.au/media/Article/cache/R3350-1_CBA.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://nett.com.au/media/Article/cache/R3350-1_CBA.jpg" width="239" /></a></div>I guess talking about relationships and the dynamic between men and women in general is going to require me to be a bit candid, huh? Well, here goes nothing.<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I was recently emancipated from a serious relationship of almost two years. I can't pinpoint the particular moment, but there was a shift. After we incurred the dreaded "break," there was a shift in communication, in priorities and the direction of the relationship.<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I wanted the same things, but on my terms. Where I felt I couldn't express myself to him, I poured out to Twitter because deep down inside I knew what I had to say wouldn't lead to anything positive. I found interest in the happenings with other people, where I should've kept my interest in him. We had our problems, like any couple, but we were still invested. We eventually wanted to be married. He tried to be a good partner, but I was detached and he knew it. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">He was everything I wanted and everything I didn't want all wrapped in one. So here lies my question, why do women remain in relationships when instincts tell them otherwise? Are we afraid of sacrificing our relationships for our own feelings? And do we bury how we feel just to get by?</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
Looking back, I definitely believe the lingering is more painful to both parties than addressing the issues.</div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>Miss Emme</b></i></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-57918548278471773132010-10-20T13:17:00.005-04:002010-10-22T23:19:11.947-04:00One Last Romp?<div style="text-align: justify;">I miss you, lovelies! I recently received a tweet from a fellow blogger, Mannie from <a href="http://freshhonesty.com/">FreshHonesty.com</a>, that really touched and inspired me. I really hope he doesn't mind me talking about him! He asked me if I had visited his site, which I do regularly [his growth has been amazing]. But what really hit home for me was when he told me that he never forgot that I inspired him to start. It was that simple. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">I was thinking about how amazing that is and then wondered to myself why I stopped writing. I was definitely tired of writing the entertainment randomness that I truly enjoyed, but everyone does it. I tried the natural hair stint and never got it off the ground. Mannie's comment and an article in the November issue of Essence [yes, I'm still reading Essence, don't beat me] about relationships inspired me to try a new route. </div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: justify;">J'adore Miss Emme is taking the relationship path. I recently got out of a serious relationship and it left me examining myself, my relationship and other issues surrounding Black women and love. So let's talk about love. Are you with me? </div><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>bisou, bisou</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i>Miss Emme</i></b></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #ba65dd; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 19px;"></span>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2527492250633082884.post-70275244420210615362010-04-17T01:15:00.000-04:002010-04-17T01:15:25.794-04:00I've Moved on to Manes<div style="text-align: justify;">Hello there lovelies! I am here to tell you that I've moved! I'm currently working on a new blog project called "Media Manes with Miss Emme" for you all to enjoy. It's brand new and will be getting into natural hair and it's sudden popularity in the media. Follow me here... </div><div><div style="text-align: justify;"><br />
</div></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.mediamanes.blogspot.com/"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkZEPYkzi7JG_6Geo6iYco-sHtsMZ9Bc9z_tPW-EMBR6oalmdYNzXt0NUpIywk6h9OYFhCacUCtXn5eTKDEzml4KtfVUOuHXrJbRhiquAQnGSuC3VUx7_XXPBU8Ovpy4FJ4NZ49SxH2Mc/s320/Media+Manes.jpg" width="292" /></a><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #ba65dd; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #ba65dd; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; line-height: 19px;">bisou bisou</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #ba65dd; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-weight: bold; line-height: 19px;"><div style="text-align: center;"><u>miss.εmmε™</u></div></span></div>Miss Emmehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14825874167551933669noreply@blogger.com0